24, You Get What You Pay For
I guess I am going to have to create a new category for this one…
There is a free 10-15 page, magazine sized, newspaper in Vancouver called “24 Hours”. There was a blossoming of these rags 6 months or so ago, another one is called, “Metro”. They hired armies of minions and sent them forth to thrust a copy of their paper into your hand at every opportunity. Their were actually more of them on the streets than beggars, which for Vancouver is quite something.
Needless to say, I would rather listen to my ipod on the bus than read these things. They are pretty light and presumably sized for the average bus commute. However, today, whilst standing on the bus, I couldn’t help but read the title of an article over the shoulder of some fellow rider.
“Don’t be so rude” by 24 Hours staffer, Robyn Stubbs. The article describes all of the inconsiderate things that people do on the bus. As a long time bus rider, I was curious to see how accurate the list of annoyances were. Here’s a run down:
“Double Seat Taker” - self explainitory.
“Backpack Woes” - there two of these, one for people that bump into you with them, another for people who pack smelly sandwiches in them.
“The Queue” - people that don’t line up properly, not letting elderly in first or climbing on board with an open umbrella (I don’t think its physically possible to open an umbrella on a crowded Vancouver bus, but I guess Robyn has seen this).
“The Door Jammer” - people that block others from getting off by standing in front of the doors. This seems a natural result of the jam packed buses, its inevitable that SOMEONE will be in front of the doors, AND that it will be more or less impossible for them to move out of the way at the bus stop.
“Noise Control” - people with loud radios or loud talkers.
“The Sneezer” - After blocking a sneeze with your hand you are not allowed to use that hand to hang on anymore as that will spread germs.
“Honour thy Driver” - be nice to the driver. Although I have seen people actually threaten the driver’s life, if people could just stop that, I am sure the drivers would be happy.
“Courtesy Seats” - give these up to disabled and the elderly, duh. Haven’t run in to too many people that don’t do that.
“Personal Space” - Don’t talk to people on the bus. The typical Vancouver ideal is not having to interact with anyone between work and your TV set at home.
I think that Robyn may have missed one or two here. I think I would have added:
Urine Soaked - Don’t get on the bus if you haven’t bathed in months and are soaked in urine.
Drunk Guy - If you are drunk, thank you for not driving but try to keep to yourself on the bus.
Personal Effects - The bus is for passenger travel, not cargo. Don’t bring two green garbage bags filled with empty cans onto the bus with you.
And the most annoying behavior I have yet to encounter, time and time again, is the Drunk. Shambling Mound of Human Excrement, with Enormous, Excrement Encrusted, Bags of Empty Cans, who is eager to ride the packed rush hour bus. The term “no escape” comes to mind.
Maybe Robyn doesn’t actually ride the bus, or maybe she thinks that she is more likely to contract a bug from the sneezy guy than from rubbing against someone else’s shit for 30 minutes. Either way I had to vent…
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