The Wild Wild Westside
Some people say that Vancouver’s greatest claim to fame is that its municipal workers spend more time on strike than working. Others maintain that the essence of Vancouver can only be experienced on a warm summer day, 2 months into a garbage strike, in the downtown east side.
But there’s more. Some Vancouverites think that they are protagonists in a John Woo film. They fire weapons, with abandon, at restaurants and homes associated with the other actors in their movie. The goal seems to be to scare the other players (which it must) or kill the other players which seems less likely given that most survive. Perhaps they are wearing body armor I’m pretty sure that I would wear body armor if I found myself in a John Woo film.
Ask any person who has been to war and they will tell you of the capricious nature of the bullet. Upon leaving the gun, bullets rarely hit the right person. Sure the odd bullet will strike the intended person but the other 100 or so mostly end up going through floors, walls and ceilings and into some hapless kid playing a John Woo video game in the next room. In short, surgical strike = bullshit, unless your surgeon is Jack the Ripper.
Given the fact that Vancouver has the highest property crime rate in Canada, if not the world, I can only assume that the guilty bastards will face a sentence somewhat less than that of a certain wayward Hollywood actress. Whom I will only name in the interests of increasing traffic to this crap site, Lindsey Lohan. Nothing drives traffic like naming a popular actress like Lindsey Lohan. (Is that enough Lindsey Lohan’s or do you think that I will need one more?) Another case in point, the Air India debacle, which clearly shows the impotence of the Canadian justice system.
Marcus Aurelius, the former head buckaroo of a nation based in Italy, wrote something like “What is good for the city is good for the man”. Back then people knew the fact that the city gives us life. If the city dies then we all die, unless you are capable of living without water, food, and shelter. A city where even a murderer’s family gets murdered while he’s out murdering. Such societies are easily overwhelmed by better societies where people cooperate with one another to some extent.
Personally, I’m just not interested in living in the John Woo guns and ammo dystopia, nor the after the bomb/night of the living dead thing they got going on downtown. So if you are thinking of spraying a hail of bullets at a local restaurant tonight, why not leave that shit online, where it belongs. For an example of where the John Woo thing leads, see Baghdad. I’m pretty sure that their night life sucks. Even if they didn’t have that Islamic anti-alcohol thing, I’m sure that their nightlife would still be slightly worse than that of Yellowknife in January. Nobody wants to live in Baghdad, not even the guys with the guns, I mean, you can’t even have a shower in the morning, or boil water for your coffee because every day there is some new dude who thinks that this is his day to make his “point”.
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